Show, don’t tell

“Does a good writer tell you his character is tough and mean? Hell, no! A good writer doesn’t need to tell you. It’s obvious from what the character does!”
- M. N. Maydep

Summary: Telling your readers plain facts is boring. Showing them through stories and metaphors invokes their emotions – making your writing more fun and more persuasive.

It doesn’t matter if you’re writing fiction or non-fiction. (or even telling someone a story in person, which I talk about at the end.) If you just keep telling your readers plain facts like “good leader inspires by example”, half of them will die of boredom before they finish reading the first four paragraphs. They will be the lucky ones.

Show your readers indirectly, through stories, quotes and metaphors. This keeps them interested, and makes your writing more persuasive. Just like plain bread can be made so much more by adding butter… and ham… and cheese, and tomatoes, and salad… your writing can become much juicier and tastier by adding metaphors and stories.

I’m just a blogger, not a fiction writer, so I’ll focus on writing non-fiction in this article.

Stories

“A short story from real life makes a better point than a thousand statements.”
- Vlad Dolezal (yes, that’s me ^^)

When I first started blogging, I decided to tackle the blogosphere armed with just a few pieces of advice and some ideas to share. I was lucky that my writing was already clear and concise, as I had done some writing for the web before.

I thought having good ideas was enough. After all, I had heard the first three rules of writing for the web are the following:

1. Content
2. Content
3. Content

It’s true, but it’s not enough. Saying that content is all you need is like saying that to be a top golfer you only need good putting. There’s plenty of good putters out there – you need more than that to be at the top. There’s plenty of good ideas on the web – you need more.

If you combine good ideas with great presentation, then you really stand out.

And so I went and found out more about being a good writer, and started putting the advice into use. I started using quotes, metaphors and stories. And boom chugga wugga! People started really enjoying my writing!

Notice how I use a personal story above to make my point. I could just tell you “Great writing is about presentation as much as about content”, but that would be about as exciting as cold soup.

Also, I prefer using a first-person experience if I have one. I heard somewhere it has more impact than telling someone else’s story. Or maybe I’m too lazy to look up the story of someone else.

Metaphors

A non-fiction piece of writing without metaphors is like a movie without colors. Sure, it works, but it’s much less exciting and leaves a smaller impression on the audience. (note for you language purists – Yes, that’s a simile, not a metaphor. I know the difference. But I don’t care about the distinction, the effect on the reader is the same.)

Some people say metaphors are like spices – chuck in a few here and there, and your writing will be much better. But go overboard, and the flavor of the point you’re making will be lost in all the spicy metaphors.

Why metaphors and stories are so awesome

Ok, here comes my usual dissecting of what’s going on underneath. If you’re a regular reader, you might know I don’t like plain tactics. I prefer understanding the underlying strategy to get a full picture of why these things work. Then I can tweak the tactics to my liking, because I know what’s the important part.

If you just tell your readers the facts, you’ll reach them on an intellectual level. But facts are a thousand times easier to remember when mixed with emotion. What’s easier to remember – first picture the formula for calculating the volume of a sphere (if you don’t know it, never mind, keep reading on.) Ok, now instead imagine you’re standing in front of an audience of eight hundred people, giving a speech… really imagine it… and now imagine your belt buckle breaks and your pants fall off, dragging your underpants with them. Feel it?

The second image is much easier to remember – and it’s quite likely that you’ll remember any point I make right now, so here it is - engaging readers’ emotions makes your writing memorable. (Still see yourself standing there? Ok, you can stop now.)

Saying something is boring gets across the idea. But saying it’s “as exciting as cold soup”, or “as boring as a Friday afternoon class on a bright summer day” – that’s real description. When your readers see this, they pause and imagine the thing you describe. This invokes the emotion you’re trying to get across.

Saying something’s boring invokes the intellectual concept “boring”. Describing it through a metaphor gets your reader to experience the emotion of boredom. And that’s the key to great writing.

But that’s not the holy grail of metaphors yet. The real masters pick a metaphor, and then string it throughout the text, making references to it again and again. I’m not very good at it myself yet. But I’ve heard a speaker at my Toastmasters club who’s great at this, and it was a fascinating experience. If you want to see an example, check out Scott H. Young’s article How To Ace Your Finals Without Studying. Notice how he uses the road network analogy – pure mastery.

Show, don’t tell – in person

Ever seen someone who’s great at telling stories? They don’t just tell you the facts of what happened. They almost turn it into a movie. They use their voice and their bodies to show you what happened.

Let’s say you’re telling a story of how you were running away from a mafia gang. As you’re saying “I was running for my life”, do a slow-motion running impression, like you might see in a movie. As you’re saying “I ran across the street and did this huge-ass jump over a parked car”, show the jump in slow motion (don’t actually jump, just show as much as possible).

This draws your listeners into the story and lets them form a clear picture. Again, it’s about getting across the emotion, not just the facts.

Remember, whether you’re a writer, a public speaker, or you’re just telling a story to your friends… Show, don’t tell!