I was originally going to call this post The Day I Discovered I’m Close-Minded. Because that’s exactly what happened yesterday.
It might also seem like a post about food – since I will discuss milk, ice-cream and orange juice…but it’s really about beliefs. Anyway, let me start at the beginning…
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Last summer, I was with my girlfriend at a summer camp, and she had a bit of a sore throat. So a friend of hers suggested eating ice-cream to soothe the sore throat. This idea horrified me, because I knew ice-cream is bad for a sore throat! But I let it slip.
Fast forward 6 months later. I’m with my girlfriend again, and again she gets a bit of a sore throat. (Conspiracy?!) She suggests eating an ice-cream, but I convince her it’s a bad idea, that it would only make things worse and that hot drinks are much better for a sore throat.
Where am I going with this? I’ll get to that in a second.
You see, another thing we disagreed on was milk and orange juice. She claimed it was fine to drink both at once, whereas I’ve always been brought up that they don’t mix – orange juice will make the milk crud and upset your stomach.
So yesterday, I decided to google that, just to verify my beliefs. And lo and behold, I was wrong! Drinking orange juice and milk is completely fine, because your stomach acids make the milk crud anyway. There’s no downside, no upset stomach.
This blew my mind, because I accepted that belief as axiomatic. I heard that belief so many times from my mom that I took it as my own, and no longer questioned it.
You probably see where this is going. I googled the ice-cream & sore throat question, and discovered I was likely also wrong. I couldn’t find any solid research, but most people seem to agree that ice-cream actually soothes a sore throat.
I realized I was being completely close-minded. Just like those fundamentalist Christians I find annoying – not because of what they believe, but because they keep trying to convince others of their beliefs, yet never even pause to question if their beliefs might be wrong.
I was acting exactly the same. I believed ice-cream is bad for sore throat, and I converted my girlfriend to that belief. And I never even paused to question where that belief came from – namely from a well-meaning but misinformed mother.
So here’s one thing I’d like you to learn from my mistakes:
It’s possible you simply took someone’s well-meant but misinformed beliefs as your own, without any solid evidence.
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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
Wow…. This just speaks right to me – I know what you’re talking about on every level. I’ve had many a time that I’ve forgotten to question my OWN beliefs before questioning someone else’s, and have it turn out that had I done so, I would’ve found that their beliefs were correct and my own were not.
This should now serve as a very strong reminder to me, in case other circumstances fail to remind me first, to check my own beliefs before arguing someone else’s.
Clyde Machine´s last blog ..Free Music (and Fire) For Everyone!
I too got the OJ+Milk caveat from my mother. I seem to remember the word “curdle’ being thrown in there as well – the idea being that the OJ would curdle the milk. My wife has a favourite expression which just about covers it, tho’: “plus-minus … ZERO”, so I’ve always assumed acid and alkali input just cancels out. And I actually think your mental attitude to what you’re eating influences how your body deals with it – “Uh-oh, should i really be drinking this after drinking THAT??” will probably get you sick real quick, whereas “Hey, its all good” will leave you relaxed and satisfied.
Reminds me of the story of a new bride who cut the end off a joint before she put it in the oven.
Her husband asked why she did that, and she said, “Because my mother always did.” So later she phoned her mum, and asked why she cut the end off a joint before she put it in the oven?
And her mother said, Because your grandmother always did.” So later she phoned the old lady at the nursing home, and asked why she always cut the end off the joint.
And the old lady said, “Because we had such a tiny oven.”
There are plenty of things which made sense once. I was taught not to wash my hair when I had flu. Good advice in a cold climate, provided you don’t have central heating or hairdryers. You could lose a lot of body heat sitting in a cold room with wet hair. I was also taught at school to break an egg into a cup before you add it to a cake or omlette, in case the egg’s bad. I was in my twenties before I thought, ‘Hang on, when did I last see a bad egg?’
Sheila´s last blog ..Travel Between the Canary Islands
I have exactly the same problem; and being from a different country than my wife, there’s the cultural false beliefs as well. Contentious points include:
- Do you stick knives and forks pointing down into the dishwasher? The kids might impale themselves on a upwards pointing knife when the dishwasher is open. But does this ever happen? (Apparently about twice a year in the UK)
- Do you pull the handbrake on when it’s cold? The cable might freeze and snap. (Never happened to me, even in a colder climate than England)
- Does switching of lights all the time actually save energy? Or does it just shorten the life span of the bulbs and effectively *wastes* more energy than it saves?
- Should you boil water for cooking pasta in an electric kettle or on your gas hob? In the kettle it’s faster, but electricity generation requires more energy than burning gas.
The final two are questions I genuinely don’t know. And it’s hard to find a correct answer in the first place, so domestic trouble looms if there’s a clash of opinions on them!
Oliver´s last blog ..Go – Went – Gone
Very thought-provoking! I’ve always been one to question things like religion and politics which annoys my family to know end, but I wonder how many of the little seemingly insignificant things I don’t question.
Lyn´s last blog ..What Age Is It Appropriate To Breastfeed Your Child in Public
@Ticker:
Good point. Thinking that drinking OJ and milk simultaneously will make you sick might well have a nocebo effect (opposite of placebo).
@Sheila:
Those are great examples. I especially like the oven story
@Oliver:
Great questions. I honestly don’t know answers to any of them. (Then again, I have neither a dishwasher nor a car.)
@Lyn:
Yeah, that’s the worst thing. You don’t know what you don’t notice, because by definition, you DON’T NOTICE it
Women are bombarded by well-intentioned misinformation during pregnancy. The things our aunties tell us boggle the imagination. One that springs to mind is, “don’t hold onto the overhead handhold on the subway/bus, because it will make the umbilical cord strangle the baby”. This is said in all seriousness.
I’ve gotten to the point where I Google almost everything that’s presented to me as fact. Getting a bit neurotic about it, really.
Along with the nocebo effect, we have to watch out for anecdotal evidence, especially on the internet. It makes thousands, if not millions of people act very silly on little concrete evidence. Refusing to get children immunized is one example.
Use Google, but remember to check the source.
Gabrielle´s last blog ..Sidetracked
@Gabrielle:
Exactly.
I enjoy living a slightly less-than-conventional life, so I always try silly random stuff I see people mention on the internet. But I always check it myself, I don’t rely on anecdotal evidence.
(As an example, a friend pointed me to a community of people who brush their teeth with soap instead of toothpaste (so does he). I tried it, but it just didn’t feel right to me. One of the random things I rejected
. (I’m trying another similar unconventional thing at the moment, I’ll report on it on this blog if it’s successful.))
Hi Vlad, this was kind of random (in a good way). I have never came across an article on beliefs (which is sort of a heavy topic if you deep way down into it) that was inspired by sore throats and ice cream. I agree with you though. Whenever I have sore throat, the last thing I would eat is ice cream because I thought that makes it worse. Usually drinking tons of hot water or soup works for me. Maybe next time I’ll try that, but if it doesn’t work, I’m blaming you guys for it.
Hulbert´s last blog ..Are You Hungry Enough for It? – 5 Questions to Ask Yourself
You have presented here a very simple truth. Unfortunately, most of us are too blind to make a query as to the truthfulness of the things we believe. We always want to learn the hard way.
@Hulbert:
If you try it and your sore throat gets worse, please let me know! I like the idea that maybe I was right!
@Walter:
I like to think that after reading this post, the idea will get stuck deep in your subconscious. And the next time you’re arguing with someone about beliefs, you will pause and think “Hang on, where exactly did this believe come from?”
And then go right on arguing, because you won’t want to admit your arguing for the past half hour might have been wrong
Vlad, thank you for your insightful and honest post! Very refreshing.
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